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Quickening of the Year

by lambingseasonmusic@gmail.com

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1.
On the beach, on all fours. We buried secrets by the shores. An oh the saltiness in the air there, touching lips and brushing skin. On the beach, on all fours. Way down there where the past is. Thats where my heart beats the fastest. And oh the sharpening of the senses, as the wind blew in the dim. Hold my hand, we'll go again. Hold my hand we'll go again. Hold my hand we'll go again. There's a pulse out on the ocean. The storm it comes, and I'm afraid now. But reaching out...you're gone. Running down to the ocean, Sepia-tinted in my head. Running down to the ocean, And all of those things I wished I'd said. When you lose someone. The memory and the flood. Hold my hand we'll go again. There's a pulse out on the ocean. Hold my hand please go again.
2.
In the middle of our driveway, amongst the oil and snow. Lay an old man down upon the earth. I never knew much about it, I was only two the day that he died. I see a white wall with a large black scar. You pass it daily, it's hiding on our our street. I never knew what had caused it, but why shelter a child from the brutal truth here. Cause in 1980 moving too and fro. Wasn't such a simple thing you know. The 1980s, our sense of right and wrong. Then everything fell quiet, but not for long. (Stop and searches. Us and them Tricks of language say that you'll condemn.) Not a happy New Year. A library burned down to the ground. Gunfire and church spires; the sounds, the blasts that woke you, but you got used to. 1990 walk these streets you'll see, those strange wallflowers were growing, spreading seeds. 1990s time for us to grow, Put it all behind us, let it go. (Some for flowers. Some for show. Walls to separate us. Oh I don't know.) Progress, not falling back. Keep moving far from walls and hate.
3.
Keep your memories packed into a tin box, hide them in the library. Travelled by the light underneath lamp posts, underneath. Bring the boxes back to me. Bring the boxes back. The days of the rocking horse wars. Sitting on stone floors. Keeping ourselves warm. The days of the rocking horse wars. Travelling from door to door. Coming to no harm. Bring the boxes back to me. Bring the boxes back. We did ourselves proud.
4.
I see across those lights on a distant shoreline again. Cause I stole into my sister's bedroom again. When you ask me about myself, do I ask you about yourself? Instead I turn and back away. Just tell me what to say. See that girl. I'm told, told that she likes me. By the time I care I move. Letters fill the air. When I ask you about yourself, don't turn and back away. There's a fluttering inside. It's a flutter I can't hide. Don't wanna leave. Don't wanna go. Don't wanna live somewhere else away from here. Don't wanna leave. It's makes no sense. I've got a feeling something ends away from here. Don't leave here, don't wanna Leave here don't. Turns out those lights were not so far. Leaving this place, it's not so far.
5.
Peter 04:59
Peter turn up the radio, I think I heard a touchdown on AFN. Cause it's fun staying over late when you've got no school. And first thing tomorrow morning, just outside of here we'll act it out. But tonight don't go to sleep, just break the rules. We fought wars in the street. Battle lines, bullies beat. In the end, all fall down. Inch by inch. Pound by pound again. And Peter, I hear someone coming. So let's be quiet, so stealthily still. Surprise attack, remember all our drills. We fought wars in the street. Battle lines, bullies beat. In the end, all fall down. Inch by inch. Pound by pound again. “Turn the light off” he said Ho! In time. We fought wars in the street. Battle lines, bullies beat. In the end, all fall down. Inch by inch. Pound by pound again.
6.
Wicked Man 05:23
Well I heard there was a wicked man Who used to live in number 9 And if you want to know I'll tell you why Well when I was playing hide and seek In the garage there I stole a peek A dead bird lay on the ground Well the other day I saw a car All muddied up and driven far I didn't see it come or go But then I saw a subtle change Fingerprints on window-panes But still the bird lay on the ground Well I don't know just what you know But that dead bird's a sign That something old, and evil, and wicked owns that house And we think it lies empty and bare But I'll tell you something else I swear I saw a curtain twitch, a face flinch (Whats that he said? Is it a wicked man?) Several times I've seen another Several times, several times (Well I heard there was a wicked man) What's that he said? Is it a wicked man?
7.
Call me Home 04:31
Filling Jars and junkyards With memories I can't discard. The ominous and sonorous Creeks as I wade through my mind. Call me home. Sweeping and continuous hushing of those trees, Swells around my bedroom where it cradles me to sleep. Oh how I dream. Pick me a day when I can let go. Accept impermanence. See the quickening of the year and embrace. And in equal measure dispel with the past, and notions of the future. Blocking out those shouts. Waiting for the light. A pattern to the leap across the carpet in the hall, taking care not to step on the ghost of previous fall. So follow down those paving stones, a greenhouse with no glass. An apple tree. A pear tree. Guardians of the grass. There you'll find a little boy, forever in that dream. Remember that idyllic scenes are not always what they seem. Call me home.
8.
Truth be bold. The path I took was never sold. I was running on without. The rivers lied. As feelings of those days subside. They were running on without. These new smells borne from absence. The empty bottles of self defence. A slow decay, withering day to day. Cause we're running on without. A few words, on the mend again. A few words, the end again. The jelly's set. The party's on now don't forget to smile, cause we're running on without.
9.
In the middle of our driveway. I just stood and stared. In the middle of the driveway. I'm still standing there. The echoes of sounds, and voices. It's all fading now.

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released September 27, 2019

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